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This Champagne Mojito Is the Last Thing I Own

This Champagne Mojito Is the Last Thing I Own--Ross O'Carroll-Kelly (Paperback)

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4.85
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This Champagne Mojito Is the Last Thing I Own

This Champagne Mojito Is the Last Thing I Own--Ross O'Carroll-Kelly (Paperback)

4.85 48,400 ratings · 9,412 reviews
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Overview: We don't think we can improve on the author's own summary of his book: I am many things, roysh -- unbelievable babe magnet, red-hot lover, loyal kind of goy, best forward who never played for Ireland -- but there's a few things I was basically sure I'd never be, related to a jailbird for storters, or listening to the old dear getting randier than a goat in heat, or even a father, for that matter. It's funny how life decides to throw you a total hospital pass every now and then. Really, like, hilarious. One minute you're the man, a ledge in his own town, every bird in sniffing distance wanting a piece of the action, and the next ...Well let's just say if I had gone to Blackrock Morket, roysh, and paid some crusty old crone to tell my future, and she told me all this, I would have said, 'Sorry, witch features, but what the fock are you banging on about. I'm Ross O'Carroll-Kelly. I am the man, and I always will be. Roysh!' I would have been wrong, dude. And we are talking totally here.

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Topics & Genres

Pages 368
Publisher Penguin Ireland
Published 2007
ISBN 2021142
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Ross O'Carroll-Kelly
About the Author
Ross O'Carroll-Kelly
17,637 Followers

Ross O'Carroll-Kelly is the author of several novels. Originally from the East Coast, they now live in the Midwest with family. In addition to writing, Ross O'Carroll-Kelly enjoys gardening, cooking, and reading way past bedtime. Their work often explores the complexities of everyday life and human relationships.

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Sarah Evans
Sarah Evans July 02, 2024
A highly sophisticated read. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A very distinguished novel.
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A very strong entry. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. A true literary gem.
Christopher Diaz
Christopher Diaz June 06, 2024
A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A solid 4 stars from me.
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Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A solid 4 stars from me.
Michelle Sanchez
Michelle Sanchez November 09, 2025
Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Stephanie Lopez
Stephanie Lopez July 30, 2024
A very strong entry. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. Quite impressive overall.
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Betty Evans December 24, 2025
A decent, if standard, experience. It possessed moments of brilliance, but the narrative felt slightly disjointed ultimately. Unlikely to reread, but a reasonable expenditure of time.
Sandra Reyes
Sandra Reyes December 15, 2025
A profoundly satisfying read. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. Worth every moment spent reading.
Charles Anderson
Charles Anderson March 03, 2024
Excellent, though slightly flawed. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Jacob Flores
Jacob Flores May 22, 2024
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Margaret Martin
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Thomas Hill October 02, 2025
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Masterpiece from start to finish. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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A profoundly satisfying read. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
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Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
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Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
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Such a rich narrative. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
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Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
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Exceeded all my expectations. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An effortless 5 stars.
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Such a rich narrative. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. A true literary gem.
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I find myself somewhat conflicted. It verged on repetitive in the second act. A more concise edit would have served it well. Perhaps more aligned with a different audience's tastes.
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Absolutely brilliant. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
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I was completely blown away. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. Worth every moment spent reading.
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I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An effortless 5 stars.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. Worth every moment spent reading.
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I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Absolutely brilliant. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An effortless 5 stars.
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Exceeded all my expectations. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An effortless 5 stars.
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A highly sophisticated read. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Richard Gonzalez
Richard Gonzalez February 17, 2024
I find myself somewhat conflicted. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Perfectly average.
Steven Flores
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Exceeded all my expectations. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Michelle Roberts
Michelle Roberts October 30, 2025
Masterpiece from start to finish. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. A true literary gem.
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Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. Worth every moment spent reading.
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I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
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A decent, if standard, experience. The prose was competent, yet the characters lacked the depth I usually seek. Suitable if your reading queue is empty.
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Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. A true literary gem.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An effortless 5 stars.
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Such a rich narrative. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. A true literary gem.
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A profoundly satisfying read. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Sandra Turner
Sandra Turner October 15, 2025
I was completely blown away. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars.
Jacob Harris
Jacob Harris April 13, 2025
I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A solid 4 stars from me.
James Garcia
James Garcia November 09, 2025
Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Lisa Johnson
Lisa Johnson January 16, 2024
A highly sophisticated read. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Cynthia Sanchez
Cynthia Sanchez February 17, 2024
Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. Worth every moment spent reading.
Thomas Roberts
Thomas Roberts June 24, 2025
I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
David  Davis
David Davis February 18, 2024
A very strong entry. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Linda Roberts
Linda Roberts October 20, 2024
A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. Quite impressive overall.
Christopher Lopez
Christopher Lopez March 12, 2024
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. A true literary gem.
Sandra Roberts
Sandra Roberts November 05, 2025
Exceeded all my expectations. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A very distinguished novel.
Gary Smith
Gary Smith September 25, 2024
A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel.
Donna Hill
Donna Hill February 17, 2025
A profoundly satisfying read. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Donald Turner
Donald Turner July 21, 2025
Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Stephanie Gonzalez
Stephanie Gonzalez October 01, 2025
Absolutely brilliant. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. A true literary gem.
Susan Martin
Susan Martin March 23, 2025
I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. Quite impressive overall.
Mark Miller
Mark Miller January 30, 2025
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Jessica Lopez
Jessica Lopez October 30, 2025
Excellent, though slightly flawed. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. Quite impressive overall.
Margaret Harris
Margaret Harris December 03, 2025
Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. A true literary gem.
Daniel Miller
Daniel Miller October 22, 2024
Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. Worth every moment spent reading.
Rebecca Diaz
Rebecca Diaz March 15, 2024
Excellent, though slightly flawed. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Kenneth Reyes
Kenneth Reyes June 10, 2025
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem.
Linda Cruz
Linda Cruz November 27, 2025
Absolutely brilliant. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. Worth every moment spent reading.
Gary Flores
Gary Flores December 25, 2024
A profoundly satisfying read. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Cynthia Sanchez
Cynthia Sanchez May 14, 2024
I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Anthony Walker
Anthony Walker May 17, 2025
An acceptable diversion. The prose was competent, yet the characters lacked the depth I usually seek. A fair 3 stars.
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A highly sophisticated read. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A solid 4 stars from me.
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Excellent, though slightly flawed. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Sharon King
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Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. Quite impressive overall.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Cynthia Robinson
Cynthia Robinson April 15, 2024
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Eric Hall
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Such a rich narrative. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. Worth every moment spent reading.
Laura Walker
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Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
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James Rodriguez
James Rodriguez January 24, 2024
A highly sophisticated read. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Ashley Diaz
Ashley Diaz September 25, 2025
Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
John Edwards
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A profoundly satisfying read. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. A true literary gem.
Gary Taylor
Gary Taylor May 14, 2024
I was completely blown away. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. Worth every moment spent reading.
Michael Scott
Michael Scott January 08, 2025
Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A solid 4 stars from me.
Jacob Evans
Jacob Evans March 19, 2025
I was completely blown away. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. A true literary gem.
Donald Young
Donald Young February 03, 2024
Excellent, though slightly flawed. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. Quite impressive overall.
Betty Smith
Betty Smith February 03, 2024
Excellent, though slightly flawed. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Carol Anderson
Carol Anderson July 31, 2024
I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Mark Walker
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Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. Quite impressive overall.
Richard Cruz
Richard Cruz October 31, 2025
Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A solid 4 stars from me.
Margaret  Davis
Margaret Davis August 20, 2024
Exceeded all my expectations. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem.
Michelle White
Michelle White February 07, 2025
Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Kevin Sanchez
Kevin Sanchez February 20, 2024
Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Deborah Allen
Deborah Allen May 29, 2024
I find myself somewhat conflicted. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Perfectly average.
Thomas Adams
Thomas Adams December 02, 2025
Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Elizabeth Jones
Elizabeth Jones January 27, 2025
Exceeded all my expectations. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Laura Thompson
Laura Thompson May 03, 2025
Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. A true literary gem.
Melissa Brown
Melissa Brown March 22, 2024
Such a rich narrative. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. Worth every moment spent reading.
Carol Reyes
Carol Reyes September 25, 2025
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Daniel Turner
Daniel Turner June 23, 2024
A highly sophisticated read. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. Quite impressive overall.
Nancy Harris
Nancy Harris December 07, 2025
I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. Worth every moment spent reading.
Joshua Martinez
Joshua Martinez June 04, 2024
Exceeded all my expectations. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. A true literary gem.
John Gonzalez
John Gonzalez February 16, 2025
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Deborah Garcia
Deborah Garcia December 26, 2024
Absolutely brilliant. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Nancy Walker
Nancy Walker September 17, 2025
A profoundly satisfying read. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars.
George Johnson
George Johnson January 12, 2025
A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A solid 4 stars from me.
Richard Phillips
Richard Phillips May 13, 2025
Excellent, though slightly flawed. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A very distinguished novel.
George Young
George Young May 20, 2025
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Linda Ramirez
Linda Ramirez January 10, 2025
Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An effortless 5 stars.
Susan Martinez
Susan Martinez December 14, 2024
An acceptable diversion. Certain acts were fascinating, while others felt like a slight endeavor to complete. A fair 3 stars.
Mark Ramirez
Mark Ramirez December 01, 2025
Absolutely brilliant. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Elizabeth Williams
Elizabeth Williams July 02, 2025
Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An effortless 5 stars.
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